by Diane Estrella on March 8, 2010
The only way I can describe it is Ahhhhhhhhh!
Chaos, mayhem, craziness and me….out of sorts.
Reconstructing our 100 year old house has been an ongoing process now for over three years. Chipping away and removing old, in some cases, water damaged lathe and plaster and putting up new sheet rock walls in each and every room is tiring. My husband and his two friends have chipped away at projects, turning years of neglected ugliness into a live-able home.
Lesson learned…… sometimes things get ugly and messy. Not just messy, hideous! Underneath there is a whole lotta yukkiness that I don’t want to deal with. It’s covered up, right? Hidden and not hurting anyone……….? WRONG!
Decay, rot and mold could eat this house from the inside out.
How about our hearts? Our minds? What’s in there “hidden” and rotting? Those things we have stuffed into the corners of our hearts and minds, eventually do come out. One way or another, things NOT dealt with have a way of being uncovered.
So I ask, is there anything in you that needs to be reconstructed? I can’t promise it will be pleasant or easy at times, but what you will have when you’re finished will be a shiny, new you! Cyber hugs going out for your renovation project!!!!
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by Diane Estrella on March 5, 2010
Ever play this game?
Shoulda decided it was a great day to just lay on the couch all day, watch TV and rest. Yeah, she should of wrote out thank you notes, returned phone calls, gone to the grocery store and cleaned the bathroom until it was spotless, but Shoulda didn’t. She just decided it wasn’t going to happen today, so why live with the anxiety of what she should have been doing and just take a day off? Shoulda feels guilt. Maybe Shoulda stayed up with a sick kid/pet/spouse/herself all night and is physically too exhausted to “function” today.
Woulda would have loved to meet a friend for lunch, but she had too many errands to run. She could invite the friend over to her house instead, but that would of involved having to pick up and dust and she would if only she had felt like it. Maybe if the stars were aligned perfectly it would of happened, but unfortunately she has ten more things on her “to do” list to check off. Woulda feels inadequate. Maybe Woulda is being pulled in too many directions and needs to learn how to just say no.
Coulda just wants his own way. Yeah, he could go and visit his Grandfather in the nursing home, but that would involve some discomfort on his part and he does not want to feel uncomfortable. This was his time and he could have the opportunity to do whatever he wants to do. It was his day off and he really wanted to make the most of it and just enjoy his time the way he wants to. He could really use a mental break. Coulda feels selfish. Maybe Coulda has had one of the worst weeks of his life at work. He is under constant stress of losing his job and the boss has yelled at him repeatedly that he needs to work harder and do more to meet expectations.
Anything sound familiar? Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda, are our worst enemies. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Don’t live in regret. Take things one day at a time and give yourself some grace when things are wonky in your life. Anybody else playing the shoulda, woulda coulda game? Wanna play Scrabble with me instead?
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